Excitement and Waiting

I am so excited; My new camera is arriving today! Yes, today! Tracking shows it left this morning at 4:36 A.M. on a truck to be delivered. It’s almost 1 P.M. here. It’s coming. Any minute someone in a brown shirt and brown shorts (this is Texas) could ring my bell and deliver–Ta Da– the goods, the camera.

I am so excited because I know very little about taking pictures. I am not bogged down by rules and expectations and perfectionism; I am ignorant and free!!!!!!!!!!

I remember feeling this way about writing as I rushed through the writing of my first book. Oh Joy! Oh Fun!

But even then, I had expectations of being published someday. With photography, I don’t expect anything. Okay, just a lot of fun and mistakes, and wows and slideshows for the family.

I’m sitting in the office looking out the front window of the house. That big brown truck will pull up any minute.

Any minute now.

Thank You, John Updike.

John Updike’s body died. Blessings and gratitude to you, Mr. Updike.

Here’s a picture of his family. I send Condolences.

He left quite a legacy.

Here’s the NY Times article.

A video interview in 1995 about Updike’s short story “a&p”

Interview on Charlie Rose starts 29 minutes and 58 seconds into the video. It’s about his novel Terrorist and about Iraq.

The yearning for an afterlife is the opposite of selfish: it is love and praise for the world that we are privileged, in this complex interval of light, to witness and experience.
-John Updike

The essential self is innocent, and when it tastes its own innocence knows that it lives for ever.                                                          –John Updike

Amen.

Spontaneous Creations

Sometimes I pop myself on the head and say, Oh, yeah. Freewriting. I forget that going back to that always benefits me whether it clarifies to me where I’m at, gets me unstuck or gives me a great first line for my novel.

Today I met with two magnificent, caring, generous writing buddies, Ron and Larisa. My schedule is a little more limited than theirs, so they were generous to meet with me on short notice. Rainy, cold, silver day. Sitting in Pacha’s- a house cafe’, with arched doorways, wood floors, organic coffees, Acai smoothies and a fantastic chef that makes the best Spinach quiche I’ve ever had. Round red table, blue walls behind two of us, notebooks (paper not computer) in front of  us. Just a ten minute freewrite and I felt juicy again, not stiff, or worried, but ripe, juicy.

I’ve been so caught up in the rules and have-tos and how to fix my novel ideas that I haven’t been enjoying the process. I’m ducking away and going to explore the visual for a while with my new Canon Powershot SX10 IS camera. And I’m going to plunge deep in freewriting to get my writing joy back.

How do you get your writing joy back? your passion for creating?

With joy,

Laurie Cosbey

UPDate about Suicide Prevention

YouTube is partnering with National Suicide Prevention Lifeline to offer resources to the YouTube community. Check out the info and their PSA.

And more YouTube videos.

You don’t have to wait until you are contemplating suicide to call the Suicide Prevention number, 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

There’s also a teen hotline. Teen Education And Crisis Hotline (for suicide, alcoholism, drug use, loneliness, depression, family problems of all kinds)    1-800-367-7287

Free, confidential and open 24 hours.

Happy Chinese New Year!!!!!!

Monday, January 26th, 2009 is the first day of the Chinese New Year.

Monday kicks off a 15 day celebration. So, Sunday, clear the clutter and clean the house to start the Year of the OX (Ji Chou) with a clean slate.

Those born in the year of the Ox are leaders with endurance, patience and fiery tempers when pushed too far for too long.

Do rituals in nines next year and throw on some jade. There’s at least 15 days to party so decorate with red, oxes, and tangerines in a bowl for prosperity.  Eat some traditional New Year foods.  Craft for fun with your kids.

Photo by by KoAn La Scrivana  with some rights reserved.

Happy Chinese New Year! (A great site)

 Kung Hei Fat Choi!   “Congratulations and Be Prosperous!”

Human, human, durnit!

Wednesday night I felt so good. I went to my Book Group. Wall of glass with night outside. Barnes and Noble between magazines and Wedding books. Chairs in a circle around square wooden tables.

We discussed Robert Ford’s The Student Conductor, which is one of my favorite novels. I enjoyed seeing it from these intelligent, fun women.

Then after all our discussion, I said something stupid. That pettiness I was talking about. I said something that I wasn’t even in agreement with, something stupid to try and be witty, fit in. Ha ha.

I’m just human, durnit! (I secretly think I’m an alien, but I keep receiving evidence of just being human.)

That feeling right before I said it, a welling up of thick goo, my mind saying no, hearing the words come out of my mouth.  Aaaargh!

These are our characters. People that want to be doing the right thing. But also, people that want to be liked. People that don’t want anyone to know they exist, but are dying of loneliness and isolation. The tension within the character is what gives her life.

Just showing the words coming out of my mouth would probably make you think less of me. But knowing that I didn’t want to do it. That I felt it come up, heard it, wanted to pull it back but couldn’t pull it back fast enough, might allow for some sympathy. So you can decide if you want a character to appear sympathetic or not. Of course you are also bound by what POV you are using. It’s tough on readers if we go in the head of someone for one paragraph in a whole novel.

I know you are dying to know what words I said, but I want you to like me.

Humbly,

Laurie

Happy Birthday

To everyone who has a birthday in January!

That includes me.

Nothing like a birthday to make me wonder what next year will be like. I see how much I grow each year. (I try not to look back and say, I can’t believe I was that _selfish, petty, slow, thoughtless___or whatever fun activity I indulged in that year.) So, what will next year hold? Can’t I just skip over how selfish, petty and stupid I’ll be this year?

I have to take each moment and be present in as many of those moments as I can.

With ecstasy,

Laurie