Birdsong

Dear Rumi, this is my longing and my prayer, too.

 

Birdsong

Birdsong brings relief to my longing.

I am just as ecstatic as they are,

But with nothing to say.

Please, Universal Soul

Practice some song,

Or something,

Through me.

 

–Rumi

Goodbye Michael and Farrah

I’d say I’m speechless, but then I wouldn’t be writing this blog. I just don’t know how to express how I feel.

I come home and am standing in the kitchen, low lights, with my husband and his sister and I hear a comment. “He was 50.”

“Are you talking about someone who died? Who?”

“Michael Jackson.”

I swallowed, wanted to be alone, searched my mind, but found only void.

“Farrah, too. It’s been a weird day.”

Two icons from my life. People that were models, heros, artists.

Both brave survivors, supernaturally brave.

I feel, above my heart, below my throat, a fist-sized weightiness, not a rock, but a weight just the same. Farrah’s tremendous sense of life and her beautiful smile will never be forgotten.

Mostly, I am shocked about Michael Jackson, a larger-than-life legend. I can’t have danced to his music so much and listened to his music so much without it getting into my soul and without there being a connection between us. Just like the rest of us, he just wanted to be free and happy. He tried so hard to be free…

I think that sticks with me, connects to that inner yearning within each of us.

He gave me so much joy!

Thank you, both, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson.

Here’s Michael Jackson on YouTube. Here’s Farrah Fawcett on YouTube.  Sometimes we just need to go back and watch or read about or connect in some way with people who have died. These links are for that. An honor to them and a sense of connection for us.

May you find the peace you are yearning for.

Laurie

Loving it is enough, isn’t it?

I read this in Sue Monk Kidd’s The Secret Life of Bees and cried:

“Actually, you can be bad at something, Lily, but if you love doing it, that will be enough.”

There was relief in that crying. I can just do it. Just because I love it! Oh God, thank you.

But now, a week later, I ask myself, Is it enough?  Is it enough for me to just love doing it–writing?

Of course, soon after reading the Bees quote, I reread something (that I didn’t remember from any of the earlier readings) in The Intuitive Writer by Gail Sher.  Sher tells a story about a painter in the 30s, Harlen Hubbard, who from seeing his work ignored and rejected, eventually (ten years later) rejected all others, but not his work. He kept painting. Sher writes,

“‘No Paintings for Sale’ Hubbard firmly tacked across the door of his studio when he realized that the mere hope of sales and acceptance by other  artists had created a psychic trap. Not untl he could paint without even the possibility of selling, would he be able entirely to surrender to himself.”

And that surrender, that freedom for the work to come from Truth,  is more important to me than “the mere hope of sales and acceptance by other artists.”

So, Yes, for me, Loving doing it is enough.

Popping In

So gone that when I visit my own page, I have to sign in again. Reveals how long I am away.
I miss blogging.
I am currently enjoying reading Tiger Moon, a youth novel that reveals India through a young woman who is expecting to die each night, but continues to be blessedly left alone to tell her story in legend form. Dreamy language takes you into both stories:hers and her legend.
Wise One saw it on the shelf and plucked it for me. She picks out better books for me than I.
Back on chocolate, swimming almost everyday, tanning despite lavishings of SPF 50 sunblock and freewriting.
I am still enjoying taking pictures and have learned some things, but not too much.
Here’s a fun pic I took because, yay, I carried my camera with me and saw this.
Blessings to you all,
Laurie Cosbey

Murder, Mayhem, Mystery info

Hello,

I want to share the info about this Mystery Month in Central Texas. Free, free, free stuff and loads of character.

Monday, May 4, 5:00-5:30 p.m. Glynn Marsh Alam on ‘Murder She Writes’ – an internet radio show featuring women mystery authors  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/MurderSheWrites   Sylvia Dickey Smith, Host   sds@suddenlink.net

Thursday, May 7, 7:00 p.m, ‘Writing Dynamic Dialog’  L. C. Hayden.  Georgetown Library, 402 W. 8th St   Georgetown, TX 78626   Richard Groves  512-931-7620 .
San Gabriel Writers League, Joy Nord  rnord@austin.rr.com .

Friday, May 8, 6:00 p.m.  Signing  “Why Casey Had to Die”  L. C. Hayden   lchauthor@yahoo.com   Barnes & Noble Westlake #P860 701 South Capital of Texas Highway Austin 78746   1-512-328-3155   crm2757@bn.com  

Friday, May 8 (6:30-9:00 p.m.) and Saturday, May 9 (9:30-11:30 a.m.)  ‘How to Write a Mystery’  L. C. Hayden  
Thursday, May 14, 7:00 p.m.  ‘On Writing Mysteries’   George Wilhite, Michael McCracken   Barnes & Noble Waco 

Monday, May 11, 5:00-5:30 p.m.  Pat Brown on ‘Murder She Writes’ – an internet radio show featuring women mystery authors  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/MurderSheWrites Syvlia Dickey Smith, Host   sds@suddenlink.net

Friday, May 15, 5:30 p.m.   ‘Setting the Mood for Mystery’  Rosemary Poole-Carter, Betty Gordon, L.B. Cobb, Laura Elvebak, Diana Driver, Gordon Payne   Katy Budget Books  2450 Fry Road Houston TX 77084   Stacy Morris   281-578-7770   <marketing@katybooks.com>

Saturday, May 16, 1:00 p.m.   ‘Meet a Mystery Author’   George Wilhite  
  
Saturday, May 16, 3:00-4:30 p.m.  ‘Using Local Resources in Mystery Writing’  Sylvia Dickey Smith, Moderator, Joan Upton Hall, Micqui Miller, Dave Ciambrone  Hill Country Book Store 719 S Main St, Georgetown, TX 78626 1-512-869-4959  Margarite Holt
hcbookstore@suddenlinkmail.com

Sunday, May 17, 2:00-5:00 p.m.  ‘Barbara Burnett Smith Aspiring Writers Event’
Co-sponsored by the Barbara Burnett Smith Mentoring Authors Foundation, the Barbara Burnett Smith Aspiring Writers Event will feature the presentation of the 2009 Sage Award to Texas Mystery Author Micqui Miller.  The Sage Award honors a member of the mystery writing community who is an inspirational and encouraging mentor to aspiring mystery writers.  The Event includes a signing by Ms. Miller, ‘A Mystery in Four Parts’, and presentation of the 2009 Mentor Authors and Aspiring Writers.  Barnes & Noble Westlake #P860 701 South Capital of Texas Highway Austin 78746   1-512-328-3155   crm2757@bn.com   Sisters in Crime Heart of Texas Chapter   hotxsinc@yahoo.com

Monday, May 18, 5:00-5:30 p.m. Jane Finne on ‘Murder She Writes’ – an internet radio show featuring women mystery authors  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/MurderSheWrites Syvlia Dickey Smith, Host sds@suddenlink.net

Tuesday, May 19, 7:00 p.m.  ‘Mystery Writing Panel’   Sylvia Dickey Smith, Moderator,Diane Fanning, Karen MacInerney, David Ciambrone, Susan Rogers Cooper, Val Taylor, George Wilhite  Book People  603 North Lamar Blvd  Austin, Texas 78703  Alison Kothe Nihlean   512.472.4288 x207   events@bookpeople.com

Saturday, May 23, 3:00 p.m. and 5:00 p.m. ‘Texas Mystery Author Panels’   Betty Gordon, Sylvia Dickey Smith, Nancy Glass West, Susan Rogers Cooper, Laura Griffin, Rosemary Poole-Carter, LB Cobb, Vallie Taylor   Murder by the Book  2342 Bissonnet St., Houston, TX  77005   David Thompson  1-713- 524-8597 / 1-888-424-2842 / Fax: 1-713-522-7945   <david@murderbooks.com>

Monday, May 25, 5:00-5:30 p.m. Betty Webb on ‘Murder She Writes’ – an internet radio show featuring women mystery authors  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/MurderSheWrites Syvlia Dickey Smith, Host  sds@suddenlink.net

Visit www.hotxsinc.org for more information, or e-mail hotxsinc@yahoo.com

Happy National Poetry Month

April is the month officially set aside as Poetry Month, though we know poetry transcends time. Lovers, liars, loners, all those full of passion, desiring to live, fly, grasp what they really are continue to thrive on poetry by word or movement.

 Yes, celebrate by reading some of your favorite or some new poetry. Go to poetry readings; read your own works. Enjoy the Austin International Poetry Festival April 23-26. Or attend a festival in your area.

But also celebrate by living just a little larger this month.  And maybe even a little larger next month. You are more and you can grasp more, thrive in it.

Changes, Surrender, Art

My friend Ron put up a good post about how a story changes with time. I feel like that is happening with my book.  It has changed and changed again. It–there I go using an unclear pronoun. It, the meaning of the book has changed and so has how I feel about it.

There are some people you spend a year with and really know and then meet again a year later and feel strange around. I feel strange around Claire, Guy, Shane and the rest of the people in my book. It’s like a reunion that I missed out on some of the information everyone else knows.

But, I have been thinking about them from out of nowhere. I welcome them and want to see inside deeper into their lives and how their lives have changed. It makes sense. I am changing.

I’ve been trying to work with them over this past year, but I was trying to work with who they were before and not giving them space to grow, deepen or hate me. 

Alas, will I ever learn that when I’m slogging uphill, I’m trying to force something?

 whether it’s in writing, relationships, yoga, life…

Surrender is an interesting practice. I was so upset that Wise One wasn’t getting her sleep. (Days of being angry or sad and knowing I didn’t need to be. That it was silly to be so mad about it.)  I was rocking her on my lap in our blue La-z-Boy.  She was refusing to sleep. I kept rocking, closed my eyes, was crying silently and finally (I know, why does it take me so long?) thought , “Oh God, I can’t keep pushing against this. I can’t do this anymore. I don’t know how, but I surrender.” I opened my eyes and she was asleep, in less than a minute. We change when we surrender and we allow that which is around us to flow into its true state. Her sleep is normalizing back into the routine she was in before. She is happier and wants to spend more time by herself creating or reading.

The feeling has to be there. In art, we must surrender for it to be art, authentic in its true state. And art is any part of our lives that we allow or recognize to be in its true essence, that we appreciate as it is and allow to flow.

And now, I will remind myself to be wary anytime I think I know something.

And send you fond blessings.

With appreciation,

Laurie Cosbey

Where am I?

I’m experiencing  one of those times where I feel like I’m stumbling around in a jungle without knowing where I want to go.

I have a wonderful life with loving family and oh so many options and opportunities.

But, where do I want to go?

Okay, I know, Enlightenment. But the pet ego still wants to sidetrack, too.

My mind is a little boggled, muddled by too many dark chocolate covered almonds.

My first stop is to make a gratitude list. Okay, my first stop may be to drink plenty of water, then a gratitude list. If I then have enough clarity and will, I will brainstorm a goals list. If not, then I need to write out all these things big and tiny (and everywhere in between) that are undone, festering, in the way, to do, to do, to do.

Sure I’d like to have ten million dollars, but why? To hire people to take care of those things that are undone, festering, in the way. To feel a sense of ease. 

I am happy but also covered with befuddlement swinging through the trees overhead.

May you know peace and clarity. May you be happy and free.

With affection,

Laurie Cosbey

Aaaaaah Bach!

“Aaaaaah Bach!” Radar from MASH is coached to say to impress a date.

I agree, I can get lost, thrown, tumbled, lifted, flown all from Johann Sebastian Bach.

Happy Birthday, Bach!

Born March 21, 1685.

Died July 28, 1750.

Aaaaaaaah Bach!

Be moved by some of his music. Free.

Here’s his Toccata and Fugue in D Minor-probably his most often heard work. The organ version is my favorite.

Google+Sony=500K free ebooks

If  you aren’t already receiving Publisher’s Lunch, then you may not know this.

On March 18th, 2009, Google and Sony agreed to distribute half a million titles, all public domain classics published before 1923. These titles will be distributed through the Sony Reader freely to the consumer. “We have focused our efforts on offering an open platform and making it easy to find as much content as possible – from our store or others – whether that content is purchased, borrowed or free,” said Steve Haber, president of the Digital Reading Business Division at Sony Electronics, in the accompanying release. “Working with Google, we can offer book lovers another avenue for free books while still providing a seamless experience from our store.”

Adam Smith, product management director said, “We founded Google Book Search on the premise that anyone, anywhere, anytime should have the tools to explore the great works of history and culture—and not just when they happen to be at a computer.”

Amen to that.

And, as support to help readers access ebooks, I’m working at putting a widget in this blog somewhere, so you can access free books from here, too. Wish me luck.

Happy Reading!

MobileRead reports you may find the Sony eBook Library software, on the main eBook Store page, to the right, halfway down, under ”Unearth a Classic.”
Release